Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Is marriage the reason my wife is so sad?

Before we got married my wife just wanted to party all night, drink, slam the clam with me and have fun. Since we got married all she does is complain and cry. What the heck? She boohooed all night long last night about how she's so miserable and how I never help around the house and how my nasty friends are all losers and bums and such. So today I decided that while she was at work I would treat her to dinner when she got home. I got a whole chicken out of the freezer and dumped it into this big ole crock pot we have along with a hand full of hot peppers, a jar of bar b q sauce and a couple of cans of beer to give it flavor. I switched on the pot and then me and my buds went off to shoot some pool. Well, we did run kind of late and I didn't get home till around eight tonight so my wife was already home when I walked in. There she was -- sitting on the sofa with her face in her hands sobbing away again. WTH?? Will nothing please that woman? Well, to be fair, I didn't know that the toilet overflowed all day while I was gone (I guess it got stopped up when I dropped anchor right before I left) and flooded the hall and living room carpet. And also, to be fair, I forgot to plug in that crock pot so it just sat there on the counter all day with a rotting chicken inside. But don't y'all think it's the thought that counts? I mean I TRIED to help out but now she's all mad cause she's in there sucking up toilet water with the wet-vac. Will someone PLEASE tell me what to do to make her cheer up??:

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